LittleBigPlanet hates me.

I have an issue with LittleBigPlanet. It's absolutely amazing: a collection of accessible, easy to grasp tools that let you create anything; your own game, a race, a working calculator. Whatever. It's honestly brilliant. We just don't get on and in this relationship I'm the one who walked into a door.

You need time. Loads of time. More time than I can ever really spare, bar redundancy or crippling illness. (Note to God: neither please.) Building, tweaking, testing – it all takes an incredible effort and commitment. It can take hours to perfect the smallest piece of gameplay. Especially if you want lots of moving parts controlled by motors, switches and sensors. I want that. 

And I want to make proper games as well. Not LBP ones, real games. Exactly the kind of thing LittleBigPlanet can't do. It's like someone gave me one of those three in one biros and I've decided to recreate Hopper's Nighthawks. I'm basically an idiot.

The last thing I tried was a zombie game. I spent ages, days, making zombies that rose out of the ground and chased you. It was brilliant. Almost. The problem were the checkpoints. You only trigger them by walking past so if you get killed by a zombie before you reach a new checkpoint, or the zombie goes past the old one, you'll respawn behind it. Ah-ha, I thought. I'll attach the checkpoint to wheels and a sensor so that it moves and stays in front of the corpses. This is the point I discover you can stand on the wheels and catch a ride, making the whole 'escape zombie' challenge pointless. Bugger. Bugger it to hell. Damn you! I tried creating an electrical platform to stop you hitching a lift but it also killed you as you respawned which was catastrophically pointless. That was when I gave up, for now. I'm already concocting a plan involving poisonous gas and split levels but I know, deep in my heavy heart, that won't work either.  

[Update]

Fuck, wait, hang on. If I put the checkpoint wheels in a slot you won't be able to ride them unless you jump down and I can put gas in there to stop that.